Maxximus Field Notes · Dating & Modern Relationships

The Tea App Has 4 Million Women Rating Men. Here's What You Need to Know.

By Ryan Poole, Founder of Maxximus · April 30, 2026

27 years in sales · ~1,000 first dates · 60+ countries

Most men have no idea this is happening.

Right now, there is an app called the Tea App with over 4 million women sharing notes about the men in their lives. Women you have already dated, matched with, or messaged may be on it right now. Your name. Your photos. Screenshots of your texts. How you acted on the date. How you handled rejection. How you treated her after.

I am not writing this to scare you. I am writing this because knowing the landscape is part of operating at a high level. The same way I would want to know if there were cameras in a poker game. Not to cheat, but to play the hand I actually have.

Here is everything you need to know about the Tea App, what women are actually looking at, and how to use this information to become better.

What Is the Tea App?

The Tea App is a women-only platform that launched in 2023 and rocketed to the top of Apple's App Store in 2025, adding 1 million new users in a single week. It has since been removed from the Apple App Store but remains fully active at teaforwomen.com and on Google Play, with over 4 million users.

The premise is simple: women share their experiences with men they have dated, been ghosted by, or been disrespected by. Anonymously, without the man knowing. The Tea App uses a Yelp-style green flag and red flag review system, along with a Tea Party Group Chat where women can share information directly. It donates 10% of its revenue to the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

The largest of these platforms, the Tea App, has amassed over 4 million users. Women can search for a man by name, link his dating profiles, upload screenshots of conversations, and leave reviews covering everything from how he texted to how he acted on the date to what happened after.

Men are listed without consent. Men cannot see their reviews.

Is this fair? That is the wrong question. The right question is: what does this tell you about what women are experiencing in the dating market, and what does it ask of you?

What Women Are Actually Evaluating

After going on roughly 1,000 first dates with women from over 60 countries over my lifetime living here in South Florida, I have a clear picture of what women pay attention to. These apps reflect the same criteria.

Women are not primarily rating looks. They are rating character signals. Here is what shows up most often in the patterns:

1. How You Communicated Before the Date

Were your texts respectful and clear? Did you come on too strong too fast? Did you ask for explicit photos? Did you read her profile or just fire off a generic opener? Women screenshot early conversations constantly. The way you text before you ever meet her is on the record.

2. How You Handled the Date Itself

Did you show up on time? Were you present or on your phone? Did you listen, or did you just talk about yourself? Did you pay or create an awkward situation? Did you make her feel safe? First date behavior is the most commonly reviewed category on the Tea App. Women are watching everything.

3. How You Handled Rejection or the End

This is the one most men fail. A woman says she is not interested and a man turns cold, bitter, or aggressive. That moment defines a man's character more than almost anything else. Handle rejection with grace. Thank her for her time, wish her well, move on like a man with options. That is not just the right thing to do. It is what a high-value man does.

4. Your Honesty About Your Intentions

Were you upfront about what you were looking for? Did you say you wanted something serious when you did not? Were you on the app while in a relationship? Honesty about intentions, even when the truth is not what she wants to hear, is respected. Dishonesty is the most common flagged behavior on the Tea App.

5. Physical and Pressure Behavior

Did you respect her physical boundaries? Did you pressure or guilt after a no? This is non-negotiable. The men being flagged most heavily on the Tea App are men who pushed past clear signals. There is no grey area here.

You Can't Defend Yourself. You Can Only Build the Reputation.

Here is the thing about the Tea App that most men miss: it is not new. Women have been sharing notes about men since the beginning of time. In small towns, your reputation preceded you by weeks. Now it is digital and scalable. The technology changed. Human nature did not.

The men who are furious about the Tea App are, in my experience, the men who would have the worst reviews on it. The men who treat women well are not panicking. They are not even thinking about it.

That is the goal. Build the kind of character where this is simply not a concern.

Here is what I know from 27 years in sales: your reputation is your most valuable asset. In sales, if you are known for honesty and follow-through, referrals come to you. In dating, if you are known as someone who treats women with respect, even when it does not go the way you wanted, word travels. The right opportunities find you.

The Filters She's Already Running on You

Before you ever go on a date in 2026 and beyond, she has already done research. She has Googled you. She has looked at your Instagram. She may have asked in a group chat if anyone knows you. And she may have checked the Tea App.

Women are running four filters on every man they are considering:

• Safety: Is this man safe to be alone with?
• Integrity: Is this man who he says he is?
• Value: Is this man worth my time and energy?
• Potential: Is this man growing, or is he stuck?

Every text you send, every decision you make on a date, and every way you handle the end of something is data that answers those four questions. The Tea App just made that data visible to more women faster.

Your job is not to game the filters. Your job is to genuinely be the man who passes them. That is what real presence, honest communication, and genuine respect on a date actually produce. Not just good optics, but a reputation that travels before you do.

What This Means for How You Date

I am not going to give you a list of tricks for managing your rating. That would be the wrong takeaway entirely. Instead, here are the actual behavioral shifts that make a man someone women recommend, not warn against.

Communicate like you mean it

Be honest about what you want, early. If you are not looking for anything serious, say so. If you are, say so. Women respect directness far more than they respect what they think you think they want to hear. Your texting sets the tone for everything that follows. Set it honestly.

Handle the end like a man with options

Whether you ended it or she did, respond with grace. No passive aggression. No last-ditch guilt trips. No going cold and mean. Thank her for her time and move forward. A man who handles rejection well signals emotional maturity, abundance, and confidence. That travels.

Treat the woman you're least attracted to the same as the woman you're most attracted to

Character is what you do when there is nothing in it for you. If you are only respectful to women you find extremely attractive, women will notice. They always do. Treat every woman you interact with in dating with genuine respect. Not as a performance, but as an expression of who you actually are.

Be consistent online and in person

The version of you on your dating profile, in your texts, and on the date should be the same man. Incongruence is one of the biggest red flags women report on the Tea App. Men who seem one way in writing and another way in person generate distrust almost universally. Be who you are, genuinely, from the first message forward.

The Burned Haystack Problem — And What It Means for You

There is a concept gaining massive traction right now called the Burned Haystack Dating Method. The idea that millions of women are actively reducing their dating pool by eliminating any man who does not immediately meet specific criteria. The Tea App is part of that landscape.

The men who understand this are not intimidated by it. They use it. When the haystack is burned down to only the high-quality men, the high-quality men have fewer competitors. The bar to being the needle is not as high as it looks. It just requires actually being who you say you are, treating women the way they deserve to be treated, and showing up with the kind of presence and character that makes a woman feel safe, valued, and engaged.

That is what Maxximus is built to help you do. Not to teach you how to perform, but to help you actually become that man.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the Tea App?

The Tea App is a women-only anonymous platform where users can rate, review, and share experiences about men they have dated or matched with. It launched in 2023, rocketed to the top of the Apple App Store in 2025 with 1 million new sign-ups in one week, and now has over 4 million users. It is currently available on Android via Google Play and at teaforwomen.com. As confirmed by CNN, the app is legal in the United States.

How do women rate men on the Tea App?

The Tea App uses a Yelp-style green flag and red flag review system. Women evaluate men primarily on character signals: how they communicated before and after dates, whether they were respectful, how they handled rejection, whether they were honest about their intentions, and how they behaved physically. Most reviews are less about looks and more about how a man made a woman feel. Seen, safe, and respected.

Should men be angry about the Tea App?

Anger is understandable but misdirected. The Tea App exists because real women have had real experiences with real men who behaved badly and had no recourse. The productive response is self-inventory, not outrage. The men who have nothing to worry about on the Tea App are the men focused on becoming better, not the ones focused on tearing it down.

How do I build a good reputation with women?

Consistently. Not just when you are attracted to someone. Communicate honestly and clearly. Follow through. Handle rejection with grace. Be the same man in your texts as you are on the date. Treat every woman with the same respect you would want your daughter shown. Women have always talked. The Tea App just made it faster. Build the character that makes it irrelevant.

Ryan Poole

Ryan Poole is the founder of MaxximusAI, Inc. and author of Becoming a Man. He spent 27 years in sales, went on roughly 1,000 first dates with women from over 60 countries, and built Maxximus because he lived the problem. His mission: help men reconnect with themselves, with others, and with the life they were built to lead.